Where do I begin? People do not think in long-term cause and effect unless the outcome is obvious, visible, and close to them. But really? So much. I could write a book on this, but I don’t have the time or energy.

Everything’s gotta be easily visible. They don’t understand context. They consistently reduce things to character. No critical thinking whatsoever. How can people who don’t think like this trust anything these people say? Why should I believe they can be good leaders and do the right things for others? No thinking. Just reacting.

But it’s a choice not to understand most things, so does that count? AKA willingfully ignorant. I do it too. I don’t need to know all the ingredients in every meal. But it has to be low-fiber (unfortunately) and low-fat for now. But otherwise, if it tastes good, you can skip the details. The more “bad carbs” it has, the better. Just a tip.

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I ran away to a real city. I mean to offend. I really do. It’s been great on a short-term basis. Wish I could stay a couple of days longer.

They have doctors who can do tests without a 6-month wait! And I doubt you believe this, but they have places for people to get gas at the gas stations! You will probably never have to drive and find another place to get gas. (Unless you do it during rush hour, of course). I saw an empty gas station, and at that moment I realized that I really miss a real city.

But they don’t miss me. Prices went up, and they kicked me out a couple of years ago. This is why I’m not loyal anymore. You probably think I’m joking. However, that is 5% of the reason. Seriously.

What’s the point of explaining things or doing anything, really? My point exactly.

But I did listen to music and read this week because…hobbies and way of life. I can’t live without either. I’ve dropped a lot of hobbies over the years, including watching movies and some sports. And knitting, and I won’t go on. This could get depressing. And I want to continue to be a ray of sunshine.

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What I Did This Week

Music of the Week

Books of the Week

More fiction! This is not my usual reading pattern. Well, I grew up reading fiction (Christopher Pike, R.L. Stine, Stephen King, Dean Koontz). Then I added nonfiction. Eventually, I read mostly nonfiction for over a decade (90%), and now I’m back to 75% fiction. I never saw this coming.

• Trad Wife by Saratoga Schaefer (fiction) – My rating: ★★★★ (maybe 4.5 stars) Loved this book. It wasn’t perfect. But appreciated the dark humor. The forced optimism fits my sense of humor perfectly. I didn’t finish Schaefer’s last book, Serial Killer Support Group. It was a good premise, but ugh, too many characters and the story got lost. This book is 10x better.
• My Best Friend’s Wife by Dina Santorelli (fiction) – My rating: ★★★ (really 3.75). I don’t need to like or relate to the main character. However, I hated Sandra. UGH. She took “socially expected behavior” to a different level. Obnoxious. “Everyone must speak to me. And hug me. SMILE.” What an entitled, social b%tch. So I spent the first half of the book hating her. The book redeems itself somewhat in the 2nd half, but it’s a bad idea to have a book with a bad first half. IMO. And it’s way too long. Almost 400 pages! Almost quit.
• The Influencer by Adriane Leigh (fiction) – My rating: ★★★★ Hard to rate this book. Mixed feelings. And I just found out that it is a part of a series. Interesting. Good premise, but it didn’t live up to my expectations. It could have easily been better. From my notes (not a spoiler): How do you hire someone to be you and never see them? That’s pretty good. Wish I could do that. Maybe I will try the next book in the series… if it’s a brand new story with different characters. It looks like it might be.

Tarot Card of the Week

I pulled the Eight of Pentacles for what I need to know this week. I know the tarot isn’t telling me to work more. No, not really.

Real, possible meaning for others: focus on work related to your life’s purpose. Find something that you love and do it. Embrace getting into the flow. Blah, blah, blah.

Funny because today I was showing someone something on the computer. And she said, “Wow, you should have your own business.”

Um. These people are taking up my hours. When do I have the time or energy to construct a real business? I have 2 jobs. HELLO? Reality to the people. When I was freelancing and “successful,” I was working 80 hours a week. If I didn’t have to work for the man, I could have attempted to scale (not by buying labor – please!) and only work 30 hours a week for myself. No other jobs. But I needed TIME. I give them everything. Every single thing. Time, health, energy, etc.

Quote of the Week

Agency is neither attitude nor affect, neither blind acceptance nor a rejection of authority. It is a self-bestowal of the right to evaluate things freely and fully, and to choose based on authentic gut feelings, deferring to neither the world’s expectations nor the dictates of ingrained personal conditioning.

The Myth of Normal Gabor Maté