………
Positive? huh? Never happened.
Some people are just discovering toxic positivity as a term. They are probably lucky for that, but I’m surprised because we have some things in common.
I just want to point out that the word “TOXIC” is in front of the word “positivity,” so toxic positivity is not the same as positivity. This is obvious to me, but maybe not to others.
Personally, I don’t care whether someone is toxic to themselves or not. How would I know unless we are very close friends? And why should I care? I wouldn’t even judge a person as toxic to themselves.
Toxic positivity is only harmful when enforcing it on OTHERS. People talk about boundaries. Well, some people have a no toxic positivity boundary.
Don’t do it to others is the whole point.
Don’t tell others to:
- Just have faith and you’ll be fine.
- That happens to everyone, and most people are fine.
- Just be happy.
- Everything happens for a reason.
- Think about all you have and be grateful. (I hate this one so much because I naturally do this on most days. So, when people are this presumptuous and wrong. Ugh!)
- Just look on the bright side.
- Good vibes only!
Hmmm. I see a theme. Don’t tell people they are going to be fine. WHY? Because you don’t know that! If you don’t want to listen to the person vent, get out of the conversation.
Don’t shut them up by dismissing what they think.
That is toxic positivity. Not saying, “my life is great, and I love my cat.” That’s wonderful and I hope your cat appreciates you and doesn’t see you as a can opener. Sorry, I’m projecting.
When things in my life are going well, I’m positive too and that’s not the definition of TOXIC positivity.
There are books and journals written on why dismissing every “negative” thought is harmful. People who experience racism are well versed in people dismissing their feelings and thoughts. Same with ableism.
I’m sorry Maggie is a little uncomfortable because Jane won’t suck it up. #NotSorry
I saw this prompt and then I saw others talking about toxic positivity like it was new and I had to blog.
As long as it’s the truth then it’s not a problem, IMO. But don’t tell someone they are dying if they don’t want to know. Boundaries. But I also can’t know everyone’s boundaries unless told. But I don’t spread personal bad news. Will I say the economy sucks? Yes, because unless you live in a box…HOW CAN YOU NOT KNOW THAT?
Toxic positivity is usually not true or unlikely to happen. Basically, it’s BS people say to make themselves feel better. And I don’t need you to feel better about my personal problems. Say it to yourself to feel better. But not to me.
It has a tinge of selfishness and lacks any real concern, but not tonight. I’m tired.